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Zazz Blammymatazz
Zazz3
COCAINE
Background information
Official name Zazz Blammymatazz
Status 1970s–1981; 2012 (reunion)
Origin United States
Role Rock ‘n’ roll
Former members Bink Bonk (guitar)
Razzy (bass guitar)
Snowball (drums)
Doctor Rockso (vocals)

Zazz Blammymatazz was a clown-themed glam rock band, named after its guitarist and founder: Bink Bonk Blammymatazz. Leonard Rockstein (AKA Doctor Rockso) was hired by the band as a vocalist, and through fame and riches became addicted to cocaine.

History[]

Rockso became the fourth member of the band when he answered the newspaper ad that the band posted. The band was a hit and Rockso became the front-man, described as “a firecracker in clown paint.” The band’s fame and popularity at the time likely rivaled Dethklok before it was formed as it had many fans even to this very day. The band also recorded the hit single, “I’m Just a Rock N’ Roll Clown”. Unfortunately, the video was banned from MTV, as people could see Rockso’s “junk” through his jumpsuit. Things took a turn for the worse when Rockso insisted on being paid in cocaine, leading to increasingly paranoid and violent behavior on his part. He was kicked out of the band when he got into an argument with the other band members, accusing them of stealing his banana and/or sandwich.

It’s eventually revealed that Bink Bonk, Razzy, and Snowball were addicted to cocaine as well, simply being more functional addicts. In 1981, during a concert in Houston, Texas, Rockso met a girl named Dory McLean. During a nightly encounter at the Hump Hotel, Rockso and Dory were making out, Rockso found out his girlfriend was really a 14-year-old, shocking him greatly. Soon after, the police caught wind of this and pursued him. He managed to escape, but was later arrested. His actions triggered the band’s dissolution.

According to Nathan they had repeatedly tried to reunite between 1981 and 2012, but every reunion tour had to be canceled, due to Rockso’s drug abuse and zany decision making. One attempt of the band trying to reunite failed due to Rockso ingesting a large amount of LSD before the show. When he was on the stage, not a single song was played as Rockso—heavily affected by the hallucinogenic—spent the entire show spraying a big breasted lady in the front row with a hose. The show was canceled.

Then there was the time that Rockso tried to smuggle about twenty condoms filled with cocaine into the country by swallowing them. Soon after, he ate very spicy Mexican food, which caused the cocaine filled condoms Rockso had inside him to rupture within his stomach. The resulting overdose put him in a coma and prevented him from performing onstage. That show was canceled as well.

Another example that Nathan tells about is that Rockso borrowed twenty million dollars from an Ecuadorian drug cartel. When they asked to get the money back from Rockso, he refused, thus causing himself to get shot through his penis. Because he was lying in a hospital bed to recover from the injuries, the show was canceled. Also, because of the wound, Nathan says that Rockso “has got to pee out of the side of his dick.”

They finally reformed in 2012—with the help of Toki—were successful. Unfortunately, Toki accidentally started a fire on stage—ruining the reunion tour.

Trivia[]

  • Zazz Blammymatazz is a parody and amalgam of glam rock and hair metal bands of the 1980s in general (and Van Halen in particular).
  • The band shares a striking resemblance to the band KISS, including their make-up and stage personas as well as their partying lifestyles offstage.
  • The Zs in the name “Zazz Blammymatazz” may be a refence to 80s rockers Alactrazz, briefly featuring two of the most technically-skilled guitarists of all time: Yngwie Malsteem (who Skwisgaar is modeled after) and Steve Vai (guest voice in several episode).
  • According to issue one of the official comics Snowball has a son named Ludwig, although his canonicity is unclear both since he was introduced as Zazz Blammymatazz's new lead singer rather than the group disbanding after the McClean incident (the issue presumably being written before "Dethzazz" as it goes with the explanation for Rockso's exit from the group in "Cleanzo")

Gallery[]

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